The Joy(?) of Giving...

It happened on the day of Christmas.
You see, my vehicle is a dirty little thing. I call it a rickety wuss. It is not a motorcycle. It is a pity. That thing is a very sad sight with me, a six feet tall guy on the road. Ah, well I was parking it on the side of a relatively quiet road in Pune,believe me it was a peaceful road,such a rarity in Pune. At this point I must tell you that since four years my vehicle (ok ok! its a Hero Puch! ..a deranged species of two wheeler no more manufactured in this world!) does not have a handle lock. I carry at its backside an iron chain with a lock to put it around its tyre (pathetic, I know). So generally on such peaceful roads I let go of putting the chain around the tyre. I got down from the vehicle,put it between two handsome,robust,macho motorcycles.As I was just about to put it on the stand, a man started to say something to me from behind.

"What?" I said, my baby still in my hands.

"Oh,sorry,please put it on the stand first.........." He said in marathi.

"Oh boy...there we go again."

Bewildered, I put it on the central stand.I had not locked the iron chain around the tyre. I turned to him.
"Sir, I have to get to "Sangavi" ....I dont have any money .....when bad time dawns upon a man it leaves him stranded like this without money ...without food ...my thekedaar was supposed to come but didnt ....."

It turned out exactly what I had feared. I dont remember much of what he said. What's above is a vague idea that I am giving to you. I got it that he was begging me to give him five rupees. He was about 35, looked a respectable man, sort of. Clothes were okay, clean. He had in his hands a polythene bag which had a plastic tiffin box in it which told me that he would have set out from his home with the food. But his face did not look fine as many of his teeth were broken. As he talked, his tongue moved one of the two teeth on the side. Obviously he consumed tobacco or some such rubbish which ruins your teeth. So he did not much take care of himself.His hair were dishevelled. I was suspicious. But surprisingly he spoke a few things in the middle of his sentences in english.

"Please Sir,... help me..i have to go to sangavi..please give me five rupees..."

"What will five rupees do?"

I knew that Sangavi was a colony on the outers of Pune. He would need more than five rupees to reach sangavi,why was he asking me for five rupees?

"Yes sir, bus ticket to sangavi is twelve rupees....i will mange somehow..."

It was sad to see him plead. My wallet had many coins, a few notes. I gave him a two rupee coin and three one rupee coins. It looks even more ridiculous to give someone money in coins like that. I was still suspicious. I was like, " Okay i will give you the money, but i dont believe you, i still think you are lying.Go! do whateve you want with the money!" The moment the coins landed in his palm he started saying good things for me. "May you be successful in your life....all that you may wish..." ......and all that. .....

I cut him out!

"How are you going to sangavi now?"

"..I'll walk to Chatushringi bus stand..."

I sharply turned away,half listening to his reply, and walked away very fast.

I had this irrational fear that this guy was a thug and he would steal my two wheeler! This fear struck me while i was walking on the road and took a turn. There I looked back to see if he was following me. I did not see him anywere. When I returned I was relieved to see that awful little wuss of a vehicle.
Maybe after I gave him the money he might have started crying and was walking very slowly. How was he going to get the rest of the money? He would have probably begged to someone else, by the time he reached the bus stand. At that I was just anxious to get over and be done with him as soon as possible as I was suspicious. What if he was lying? What if he bought a bottle with that money and lied in a heap of garbage? No one can know. But there are things for which you dont have evidences. I just have a gut feeling now,after two days that he was a good man.Now I feel good that i helped somebody in need, only because i was not harmed.
Last time,on J.M. Road, there came to me a stranded woman with a child in her arms who had to go to some village. I had given her 20 bucks. I know you must be thinking I am a fool. But how the hell do they all find to me?? Gosh, maybe i could have given him 12 bucks.

I did not give with any feeling. And I did not accept his feelings of gratitude and blessings.

Honey,we fu**ed our world.

yeah honey, its all going down.
the case of medical injustice in Libya is shameless.A petition of 100 nobel laureates could not save them from death sentence.There was no epidemiological proof that they were responsible for the outbreak of HIV virus. Now tell me, why would doctors be willing to travel to such countries voluntarily? thus such countries would further their own isolation.

Next thing i read in today's newspapers is that iraq govt is making public the execution of men. 'making public' is horrendous !Iraqi government will provide video footage of the executions to national and international media. Men wearing their uniform of death, their heads covered at the gallows. 'Making public' means anyone cane see it, even your 8 year old, honey. And all will know that how ruthless world has remained, because these are all the atrocities of our world history all over again.

gosh, i am hit again by such mood, last time it was due to a different perversion of mankind.

I am shivering as i recall what i saw online three years ago. First there was an anonymous appeal on an orkut community (yeah, orkut, the same place we use for cheesy indulgences) to sign an online petition to save his/her relative being executed in iran, in public by throwing stones. then the anonymous dude laid a link in that post to where it was shown how its done. And bloody yes i saw the whole thing. hundreds of people gather to watch someone die so cruelly. somewhere in their heart maybe they like this cruelty. Poor thing is covered from head to toe in white cloth and loud prayers from the speaker are said before he is buried into the ground upto his neck. then stoned. i cannot bear to recall anymore.
Its bullshit. 'making public' is akin to spreading this poison that you have in your own head. what conviction of devil do you have in your head when you walk up to a ground to watch someone die as he is getting stoned to death? "Hey,lets go see how that guy is getting stoned to death,its nice to see the blood frow from the head of a guy buried in the ground totally helpless!!"you love to see it dontchya?

life seems fucked up people, there is no compassion left in this world.

PS. would any of those devout followers of Dr. B.R. Ambedkar want to travel in Deccan Queen? ever? I would like to see their faces when they do.

A good year

A quick post, I watched "A Good year". And I dont care what film critics say,they are "wankers", I feel that its one of the better films of this year. It solved a few problems for me.Ah, well I just dont keep from problems do I? but it changed my perspective. I love life like that. It doesnt mean that one must follow Max skinner and skit off to a life of clamness, but its a question of maturity. I remembered the punchline of the movie all the time I watched the movie("Everything matures,eventually") and in the end learned how max skinner has matured, and the aweful tasting wine of La Siroque is just a metaphor.After the film I felt such an urge of well being,I said to myself,there's nothing more important in life than family, friends, love, the people that care about you the most, let go of the trivial matters!! I called my parents and then my best friend and then talked just about anything for a long time on the phone.

You would say i am crazy but i believe the smile of russell crowe in the poster is about maturity. Its like saying "I understand, I dont mind" sheer satisfaction and immunity to any doubt, self-doubt or otherwise. This movie is magical.
This week has rather been enlightening. The gyan:
1. Words are deceptive purveyors of truth. Dont cling to thiem, try to see through them, that requires maturity. (Dont say that the word which once left your tongue can never be taken back)
2. So let go of the pain caused by the words, people dont mean what they say always, all the more when their blood is boiling. (read maturity)
3. Forgive them. they wont ask for it but you have to somewhere they love you too (read maturity again)
4. Do what you love, very very crucial, its never too late, joy begets joy, and if fate asks you to do something you dont like then take pains to make it likeable, loveable, try to see through the crap and imagine it to be something related to what you love. its all part of the same system (the alchemist)


...and now a great song to groove to! dont mind the fat lady people! she sings heaven! and the tabla is heavenly fluid,(God, a millionth time, WHY DID I STOP LEARNING TABLA!! *sobs*)